|Producer Aiba: You hungry? Here, eat this. (places chicken tempura on desk) What's that? Need chopsticks? Here, use these. (throws two pens onto the desk). Hey, EAT, quickly!|
But the clear winner of the night was Jun, because A) when it comes to acting, I'm pretty sure our perfectionist Jun treats every skit (or, well, every skit that isn't clearly meant to be pure crack) as a full-out audition even if the context is a variety show; and B) you're putting Arashi's DoS Banchou in the director's chair and asking him to unleash his inner beast fully onto poor, deferential Ohno; likes seriously, were we expecting anything less than perfect?
|That chin squeeze. Jun was pretty proud of that move after the skit was over.|
|Oh-chan feels so at home in MatsuJun's strong arms. Cue the *awwwww*|
I honestly do think that Riida was secretly enjoying this episode the whole time. I mean, not only does he get to play the role that requires the least amount of energy expenditure (which is highly important to Ohno, in case you didn't know or couldn't tell from his other performances), but he also gets to guilt his band mates into skinship afterwards. And hey, anyone still remember something called Ohmiya SK? Riida was practically born for skinship.
But the fun certainly doesn't end here! Shitsuren Chocolatier may be over, but Arashi isn't quite ready to let go of such wonderfully photogenic people entirely... yet. So welcome Mizuhara Kiko (aired 2014.05.17) and Ishihara Satomi (aired 2014.05.24) to the now-familiar white-horse set. (side note: it really would have been too much to hope for a Mizukawa Asami appearance, I suppose, ah le sigh) Kiko drew out the best in MC MatsuJun, or a more accurate way of saying this would be that MC MatsuJun drew out the best in MC MatsuJun... since his segment was sort of about Kiko, but mostly about Jun. Hehehe... divas will be divas, and they ain't gonna share spotlight, right? Kiko was a great guest though, and gave as good as she got in this hilarious segment. I mean, she made Jun's face do this:
And no, that's not from a re-enactment of the mindblowing orgasms their characters obviously shared in the drama. Just a bit of relatively harmless teasing about the 21 DVDs and roses incident with Kasumi-chan. Seriously, the Arashi members are never going to let Jun live this one down. I mean, Dear J, it's already bad enough that you snubbed Nino with a library card... but to choose Kasumi over Kiko in the ChocoJun green room??? Nope, mark my words, this is going down in NTV's store of "notable footage to air during embarrassing SP's."
|"Haven't you guys watched American talk shows?" Jun needs his leather couch and all its surrounding accessories, which of course include ostentatious roses and crystal lamp shades. You don't crimp on style for Don J!|
On the next episode, Satomi was dragged through the same dating relay as Kasumi, only her date themes were a little more mature. So basically, Riida gifts her a portrait on his wall, Nino conjures a ring, Jun acts like a gentleman, Aiba plays 'imaginary boat' and Sho... well... Sho's got his shiritori. With popcorn.
|Riida's impromptu portrait of Satomi.|
The latest episode (aired 2014.05.31) closed the month of May out in the most hilarious way possible: with Arashi as members of an American Home Comedy.... aaaaaannnnnnndddd.... AYASE HARUKA as the director/screenwriter! This needs no more words. Caps alone will do it justice.
|Blond beauty housewife Jun, Joshima-mitai Ohno, daughter Sho.|
|Papa Ohno's face, Grandma Nino, Baby Aiba and the Director-san who is having the time of her life!Ah, what better bliss than to have five gorgeous idols be your stage puppets for the night?|